Domestic Violence / Coercive Control / Diminishment

Domestic Violence DV

When people think of domestic abuse, they often focus on domestic violence. But domestic abuse includes any attempt by one person in an intimate relationship or marriage to dominate and control the other. Domestic violence and abuse are used for one purpose and one purpose only: to gain and maintain total control over you. An abuser doesn’t “play fair.” An abuser uses fear, guilt, shame, and intimidation to wear you down and keep you under their thumb.

Domestic violence and abuse can happen to anyone; it does not discriminate. Abuse happens within heterosexual relationships and in same-sex partnerships. It occurs within all age ranges, ethnic backgrounds, and economic levels. And while women are more often victimised, men also experience abuse—especially verbal and emotional. The bottom line is that abusive behaviour is never acceptable, whether from a man, woman, teenager, or an older adult. You deserve to feel valued, respected, and safe.

Domestic abuse often escalates from threats and verbal assault to violence. And while physical injury may pose the most obvious danger, the emotional and psychological consequences of domestic abuse are also severe. Emotionally abusive relationships can destroy your self-worth, lead to anxiety and depression, and make you feel helpless and alone. No one should have to endure this kind of pain—and your first step to breaking free is recognising that your relationship is abusive.

Types of domestic violence can include:

  • Physical Abuse

  • Intimidation

  • Coercion and threats

  • Sexual Abuse

  • Verbal Abuse

  • Emotional Abuse

  • Isolation

  • Economic & Financial Abuse

  • Minimising Denying or blaming

  • Using your Children against you

How do I know if I am in an abusive relationship?

 To determine whether your relationship is abusive, answer the questions below. The more “yes” answers, the more likely it is that you’re in an abusive relationship.

 

Your inner thoughts and feelings

DO YOU feel afraid of your partner much of the time?

  • avoid certain topics out of fear of angering your partner?

  • feel that you can’t do anything right for your partner?

  • believe that you deserve to be hurt or mistreated?

  • wonder if you’re the one who is crazy?

  • feel emotionally numb or helpless?

Your partner’s belittling behaviour

DOES YOUR PARTNER:

  • humiliate or yell at you?

  • criticise you and put you down?

  • treat you so badly that you’re embarrassed for your friends or family to see?

  • ignore or put down your opinions or accomplishments?

  • blame you for their own abusive behaviour?

  • see you as property or a sex object, rather than as a person?

Your partner’s violent behaviour or threats

DOES YOU PARTNER:

  • have a bad and unpredictable temper?

  • hurt you, or threaten to hurt or kill you?

  • threaten to take your children away or harm them?

  • threaten to commit suicide if you leave?

  • force you to have sex?

  • destroy your belongings?

Your partners controlling behaviour

DOES YOUR PARTNER

  • act excessively jealous and possessive?

  • control where you go or what you do?

  • keep you from seeing your friends or family?

  • limit your access to money, the phone, or the car?

  • constantly check up on you.

 Contact Us

If you feel you need someone to talk to or are looking to find support please contact me. I will provide you with empathy and a nurturing, secure, respectful, and supportive environment. I will also provide you with understanding, attention, acceptance & encouragement and honour your humanity. In our therapy your 'truth and honesty' is safe.